By Ruth on October 7, 2011
Mother has always loved to read more than anything else. That’s not surprising since she is the daughter of Max Perkins, the book editor who published Hemingway and Wolfe and Fitzgerald. He said, “Nothing is as important as a
Max's drawing of Mother reading
book can be.” About ten years ago, Mother’s eyes began to fail from macular degeneration. It was the thing she was most afraid of. She was eighty-six. She tried to keep reading with all kinds of complicated magnifying glasses, but the day came when she couldn’t read at all any more. You never go completely blind with macular degeneration, but it’s a cruel disease, because you can only see out of the edges of your eyes. In the center what you see is a gray film. So you can’t see anything you really want to see, only a glimpse of what’s off to the side, in other words, what you aren’t really interested in looking at.
Mother listened to audio books, but about six years ago I began to read to her over the telephone every afternoon
Mother when she could still see
for an hour. Both of us love it. We have read hundreds of books together, all her old favorites, War And Peace, my novels, lots of memoirs and histories. We have read all of Thor Hyerdahl’s books several times. She says she likes to hear about people doing adventurous things because she knows she isn’t going to have any more adventures. Once we got interested in the Mississippi River and read Mark Twain and everything else we could find about the river.
Sometimes we stop and talk about what we are reading. Sometimes when we are reading one of her old favorites, she will say the next sentences before I can read them to her. Sometimes she makes surprising comments. We read Alice In Wonderland and then Through The Looking Glass. She said, “Looking Glass isn’t nearly as good as Wonderland. He was trying to do the same thing over again. It’s forced.” Well, she’s Max Perkins’ daughter, after all. Now at ninety-six, her memory isn’t as good as it was. But she doesn’t forget the books she has always loved so much.
Posted in books, relationships | Tagged family, health |
Hi Ruth,
Your post gives me an idea! I have a dear friend who has almost completely lost her sight due to undiagnosed glaucoma. I used to read to her when I lived nearby up in the kingdom but it never occurred to me that I could read to her over the phone. I’m going to suggest it to her! Thank you so much.
This is the winter I will finish my novel. If you are ever interested and available to take a look at part or all of what I’ve got (about 100 pages or so), let me know.
all the best,
Miriam
Dear Miriam,
That’s great. I hope you do it. It has led to some wonderful conversation between Mother and me, and we have read so many interesting things I wouldn’t have read otherwise. I’d love to see your novel, but we should wait until the time is right for you—maybe when it’s finished. Someone commenting while you’re in the middle of it can really mess you up. Ruth
Thank you so much for notifying me that there was a new blog up. I got the RSS feed to work now, so i will be notified automatically everytime there is a new blog on your page. I am really impressed by what you write, it really has touched me. I am losing my sight at my young age to Pellucid Marginal Degeneration, which for me to describe is almost the opposite of macular degeneration (which my grandfather had). I am in the stages now of teaching my daughter to read. I just hope that she will be able to read well enough, to be able to read to me in the next few years after I lose my sight. Sharing this information was moving for me 🙂
I am so sorry about your eyes. My aunt had macular degeneration. For years she had very little sight, but she was wonderful. She continued to do so many things. I used to tell her that I thought she saw much more than people with good eyes, because you don’t see with your eyes, you see with your mind and heart. Thank you for telling me your story, and I wish you the very best of luck. Ruth
So lovely, Ruth. Tell your mother I said hello.
Thanks, Ashley. I’ll tell her.
Ruth, I absolutely love this tradition you’ve started. =) I’m so sorry to hear about your mother’s eyes, but in a way, it’s beautiful how this has brought you two closer together. =)
Thanks, Samantha. It has brought us closer together. She’s a very independent and private person. This is the first thing I have ever known that she really wanted someone to do for her. So it has been a great pleasure.
I bow down humbly in the presence of such greatness.
Ah, i see. Well that’s not too tricky at all!”
Wow! That’s nice.
Good. I’m glad you liked it.
It was a excitement locating your site yesterday. I came here right hoping to learn something new. And I was not dissatisfied. Your well thought out ideas for new events like this. Thank you for this idea and sharing your knowledge.
I’m glad it was helpful.
I need to say, youve got one of the greatest blogs Ive noticed in a long time. What I wouldnt give to have the ability to build a blog thats as fascinating as this. I guess Ill just have to maintain reading yours and hope that 1 day I can write on a subject with as substantially information as youve got on this one!
Thank you for the nice comment. If you have any questions, I would be happy to try to answer them.
Ruth you are amazing.. I have to be cognisant not to call your mum too close to your reading hour! Strong Women raise strong children…and readers too!I love your blog, so happy to have discovered it! xo
Thanks so much, Lynne. I should do more posts about what we are reading. We’re reading Kon-Tiki right now. She says she loves to hear about other people’s adventures since she’s not having any more adventures herself.